Saturday, March 17, 2007

The Secret Questions That Valerie Plame WASN'T Asked...


What a way to end the week, eh? Democrats censoring all the really important questions and subjects from Valerie Plame's entertainment-testimony-hearing-circus.

(Of course, it wouldn't have been complete without a pre-op transsexual CodePink lunatic in the hearing room, to support Val & Joe).

But as happens on occasion, JQWorld is sometimes privy to secret emails and documents that elude other bloggers and news sources.

This is one of those times.

So here are some of the questions that the Republicans at today's hearing (and even some Democrats) wanted answers to, but were prevented from asking by one of the House's new power-brokers, Loonbat Brigadeer General Henry Waxman (D-CA):

Q) "Mrs. Plame, how did you feel you would advance your cause by posing with your schlub hubby, Lyin' Joe Wilson, in artsy-fartsy pictures for gossip magazines?"

Q) "Mrs. Plame, is it true that you objected to our plan to play the opening song from 'Married With Children' as you entered the hearing room with Lyin' Joe Wilson? And if so, is this because you resent being referred to as the 'Al & Peg Bundy' of international intrigue?" (click here to play!)

Q) "Mrs. Plame, do you resent the fact that Patrick Fitzgerald, the Sherlock Holmes of your 'outing,' has not been, is not, and will not be investigating or prosecuting anyone for this 'outing'?"

Q) "Mrs. Plame, why did your husband lie when he testified that you had
nothing to do with sending him to Niger to drink sweet tea with arms merchants?"

Q) "And finally, Mrs. Plame, how in the WORLD did an obviously intelligent, articulate hottie like you ever end up with a schlub like Lyin' Joe Wilson?"

We could have heard the fascinating answers to all these questions, had they been asked; but of course, after 12 years in the political wilderness, snot-nosed "he-men" like Waxman were insistent on having their own way, or gaveling down their fellow committee members. So were were left with very little. We still don't have a conclusive answer (from Fitzgerald or anyone else) as to whether Mrs. Plame was a covert agent at the time of her 'outing' or wasn't.

Instead, we were treated to a back-and-forth between Henry Waxman
(he of mysterioius lineage and genetics; above) and Victoria Toensing, who is a genuine understated hottie, with a brain and backbone to match. Toensing tried to take Waxman to school on the law, but of course, he'd have none of it; he ain't gonna be showed up by some uppity Republican female attorney, now is he!?

Then again, there are worse things to do with a spring morning than having to look at a hottie like Valerie Plame. (Even Rush gave Val his Maha Rushi seal of approval!)

Still, one must wonder, how many bottles of wine did Lyin' Joe had to juice her up with to get her to marry him?

A lady never tells...

To be continued...

Original content is © Copyright 2007 by Jon Quixote. Email to


Carl Nyberg said...

I read your first question.

You are clearly not interested in the substance of the story.

JonQuixote said...

To the contrary, I am very interested in the substance of this story.

Such as how the entire MSM apparatus, with its collective $100 billion+(?) in assets and resources, is not hounding Patrick Fitzgerald and Valerie Plame 24/7, demanding to know what this entie hub-bub is about, if there are no and will be no prosecutions for "the leak"?

I mean, that IS what this is SUPPSOSED to be all about, isn't it?

Anonymous said...

You just like making shit up, don't you?

Anonymous said...

"Comment moderation has been enabled. All comments must be approved by the blog author."

Why does that not surprise me?